×

In the early days of the COVID-19 pandemic, I went to my friends’ house to watch our church’s first livestream service and have lunch. Their daughter, who is seven years old, said grace for us. As she prayed, she thanked God that we could watch church together, but she also said, “I’m sad that we can’t be at normal church”. 

That summed up how I was feeling. I’m sure the two of us aren’t alone in feeling sad.

Not only is grief and sadness a normal reaction, it’s also the right reaction.

We are in the middle of something we’ve never experienced before and it feels like everything around us has changed. Church life has been massively impacted by social distancing measures and there is a deep grief that comes from not being able to meet together.

Not only is grief and sadness a normal reaction, it’s also the right reaction. When Jesus saved us, he brought us into fellowship not only with himself but also with one another. We aren’t just saved from something, we are saved to something. Family.

This is a story that’s as old as time. In Genesis 2, when God made Adam, he said “It is not good for the man to be alone” (Genesis 2:18). This was the first time something in creation was not good. It was never God’s plan for us to be alone. From the very beginning, being together was important. This is the first glimpse we get of God’s people as a gathering.

In Genesis 12 we see the beginning of Israel, God’s chosen people. The promises to Abraham start with God’s declaration “I will make you into a great nation” (Genesis 12:2). God’s promise to Abram and Sarai was a family—and not a small one! Descendants more than the number of stars in the sky and grains of sand on the beach. The promise to Abram shows us what God intends to do with his people. God’s people grow through the family of Abraham, and they will be used by God to bless the world.

The New Testament starts the “genealogy of Jesus the Messiah, the son of David, the son of Abraham” (Matthew 1:1). Our salvation in Jesus makes us part of the promised nation, the family of Abraham, the gathered people of God. It’s not just that we are united to Jesus, but he unites us to one another. This is reason that Christians, right from the Church’s foundation, “devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and to fellowship” (Acts 2:42). Through their devotion to fellowship they expressed the spiritual unity we share.

In 1 Peter 2:9, the Apostle Peter talks about the people of God like this:

“You are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness and into his wonderful light.”

There is a joy that comes from being with one another, because that’s how we express our unity to Christ and to one another. It’s also one of the ways we declare the praises of God to the world.

The joy of this togetherness isn’t just a reality for now. It points us forward to an even better gathering. A perfect and eternal gathering of “a great multitude that no one [can] count, from every nation, tribe, people and language, standing before the throne and before the Lamb” (Rev 7:9).

There is a joy that comes from being with one another, because that’s how we express our unity to Christ and to one another. It’s also one of the ways we declare the praises of God to the world.

We belong to a group of people who have lived across centuries and countries and who will spend eternity gathered at the throne of Jesus. This is amazing! That’s what we express as we meet together in our humble, eclectic church family each week. So, when we can’t meet together it’s not just sad because we miss themit’s also sad because there’s a deeper truth being expressed when we are together. It’s sad because we are meant to be gathered together and anything else feels second rate. I know so many churches are working hard to find new ways to do and be church, but there’s an overwhelming feeling that this isn’t how things should be. There is a new normal and although it isn’t how we would choose to do church, it’s what we have for the moment.

How do we respond to this grief and sadness? The first thing is to name what we’re feeling. For some people this is easy. But there are times in life where even just giving a name to how we are feeling can be difficult. If that is a difficulty you are facing, here are some creative solutions which could be helpful for you and your family.

1. Emojis

Print out some emojis or faces of different expressions to represent things you might be feeling (e.g. happy, sad, angry, confused). Stick them on your fridge or on a wall in the house somewhere. You could make it part of your morning routine that everyone chooses a face that describes how the feel that day. For those of us that live alone, having a Whatsapp (or similar) group of trusted friends can be a helpful way to share each day.

2. Sad, Mad, Glad

This is something I use regularly in children’s ministry and it’s an excellent way to get to hear how children are feeling about different things in their life. I have flashcards with the words sad, mad and glad on them. Children get to choose a word and talk about something that made them sad, mad or glad. You could use this as part of night-time routine to help children reflect on their day and express how they felt about it. This week I’m using this as part of an effort to write down my reflections of each day.

3. Drawing

This can be used to help us talk about things we miss. Ask everyone to draw of picture of something they miss doing and then share it with the family.

The point of these activities isn’t to change or “fix” how everyone is feeling. We know that just saying how we are feeling helps us to feel better. This is what we are trying to do. It can be easy to want to focus on the positive side of things but sometimes just listening is the best thing we can do.

When my friend’s daughter said grace on Sunday, I could have responded by pointing out some good things about doing church at home or finding ways to try to cheer her up. But the sadness she was feeling is okay. In fact, it’s right to be sad about not being able to be together as church. Instead I simply said, “I’m sad too” and allowed her the space to say more if she wanted to.

4. Express fellowship in new ways

The ultimate solution to missing fellowship is to have fellowship. Technology will be our friend over the new few months. Use FaceTime to allow your kids to call their friends. They need to see each other, not just hear each other. Encourage them to do things together over video chat: draw pictures, play lego, eat lunch – things they would normally do together. Children probably won’t just sit and chat for a long time like some adults might, so find ways for them to play together, long-distance.

We are still the people of God. And we still need the gospel every day

The same is true for adults. We are using technology to work and do ministry, which is both helpful and exhausting. We could also make the most of this technology for games nights, Netflix parties, and cooking food together. There is a great opportunity to do “normal” things together. It just takes a bit more intentionally.

Life has changed significantly over the past two weeks. But there’s lots that hasn’t changed. We are still saved by Jesus. Our future in him is secure and our fellowship with one another is as real as it was two weeks ago.

We are still Abraham’s descendants, the people of God.

And we still need the gospel every day.

LOAD MORE
Loading