Leonard and I have just welcomed a baby girl into our family! The past nine months have been full of highs and lows, with the first twelve weeks of my pregnancy being particularly nerve-wracking. These early days in pregnancy are often bittersweet. Finding out that you are pregnant is news of great joy; but sadly up to one in five known pregnancies never make it out of its first trimester. You are the literal bearer of good news, but one that is tentative; news that could turn sad very quickly. This creates uncertainty around whether to share the news, and with whom. Can good news still be good if it is also uncertain?
Going through the first trimester of pregnancy has taught me some unique lessons about God. Firstly, to appreciate the grace of God provided through the community of believers, and secondly, to marvel afresh at the certainty of God’s good news, in a stark contrast to the fickleness and instability of our own bodies.
Dealing with Uncertain Good News
From anecdotal experience, parents-to-be usually share the news of their pregnancy publicly once it has stabilised, usually at the end of its first three months. This makes sense, considering the high risk of miscarrying in the early stages. It also reduces the risk of having to un-share good news, which is more emotionally taxing than sharing news of grief. However the obvious downside to this approach is that it means you are carrying a huge burden of loneliness by yourself for weeks on end, often in a period where support and love are greatly needed. A common response from people finding about a miscarriage is to say, ‘I’m sorry I never knew.’
In light of these downsides, Leonard and I deviated slightly from this approach. Rather than deciding to keep our pregnancy entirely confidential, we instead asked whether, if a miscarriage occurred, we would be open to sharing this news with this or that individual or group. This resulted in a surprisingly large number of people with whom we were comfortable sharing, who ended up journeying with us throughout the highs and lows of my pregnancy. Unsurprisingly, many of these are our fellow believers and the dear people with whom we ‘do church’.
Someone at church commented that in some strange way they feel incredibly lucky that there are so many people they can share terrible news with. This comment captures what a sheer blessing it is to belong to our God and his household. Within it, we are never truly alone. Our heavenly Father forges through his church a deep sense of spiritual family and belonging (Ps 68:6; Jn 1:12). Moreover, in Christ we have a brother and Great High Priest who knows what it is to suffer and cry out to God (Hebrews 2:5–18; 4:14–5:10). And together we serve a God who has throughout history responded kindly to the prayers of his people filled with great anguish and grief, including childless mothers (1 Sam 1:15–16).
The option to be vulnerable and the possibility of having someone else bear your burden is one of God’s means of grace (Gal 6:2), even if it is one discovered through periods of lament and sorrow.
The Gospel: Certain and Unequivocal
The rollercoaster of health scares and early-stage pregnancies has also caused me to reflect on a particular aspect of the gospel that makes it good, and one which I rarely consider. That is, how certain and unequivocal it is, how it is indeed the ‘firm foundation on which the saints of the Lord stand’.[1]
Imagine if the groundwork of our faith were as shaky and uncertain as that of our bodies and health; how rattled, diffident and debilitated we would feel, how taken over by the moods of the day we would be. Rather than being joyful, our daily walk with the Lord would be tense. Rather than being an enduring priority, our evangelism would be half-hearted, our sharing of the gospel highly qualified, and attended by uninspiring caveats.
Thankfully our gospel is unlike our bodies: it is certain and we can relish in its fulfilment today. In Christ we have assurance that the full ambit of God’s promises has been undeniably fulfilled (2 Cor 1:20). If we turn to Jesus, on this day we can be confident and comforted that we belong to God, and that he will not forsake us (2 Tim 2:19).
Whilst our health and pregnancies may suffer through periods of instability, our God never does. We can rejoice in the solidness of the grounds of our belief and the character of our God, we can confidently proclaim his good news as certain and unequivocal, even as we navigate all types of tentative, qualified and uncertain news around us. Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today and forever (Heb 13:8). Praise God for the certainty of his good news!
[1] ‘How Firm a Foundation, ye Saints of the Lord’, Christian Hymn, published in 1787 in John Rippon’s Selection of Hymns.
