Scary Stuff is a fabulous new workbook by Dr. Sarah Allen. Her big idea is in the subtitle: “How Knowing God and the Way He Made Us Helps With Anxiety and Worry.” I was a little apprehensive about reading this with my children at first. In our home, I’ve tended to avoid talking about anxieties and worries in an effort to minimise them. To my shame, when my girls talk about things they’re scared of, I usually employ a series of logical deductions (fast and loose and piled on one after the other) to help them face their fears. Sarah’s book has helped me immensely, and I think it’s helped my daughter too.
Ten Studies on Nine Fears
I read this book with my 8-year-old daughter, Annabelle. We went through a series of ten short Bible studies that addressed the top nine fears that we face: insecurity, the dark, getting lost, loneliness, scary storms, scary sickness, failure, and missing out. The final study looked at how we can live with an outward focus to love others, and how this helps shrink our fears.
Scary Stuff
Sarah Allen
Children are feeling more worried and nervous than before. Dr Sarah Allen is a Christian who is an Australian GP with experience in providing care and support to anxious children. She has developed a proactive approach to help children learn to face fear and other uncomfortable feelings.
Confronting Fears
The Bible studies were fantastic. We read the passages together and answered a few questions. Each chapter introduced a theological concept like the Trinity and the fear of God. Each chapter first considers the fear, then teaches something new about God, and then we learn how to apply that truth to our fear. This simple model has been so helpful. Annabelle said, “I began to like it more as I got into the routine of each chapter.” I found the model so helpful in reshaping how I deal with my own fears. Instead of trying to reason myself out of my fear with avoidance and logic, I’m learning to engage my mind (remembering), body (singing), and soul (praying) with the truth about God and how that impacts what I’m afraid of. Annabelle was able to collect a list of truths about God at the start of the book that she’ll be able to easily access when she faces a fear. Annabelle said, “I liked seeing my page of things about God grow.”
Highlights
At the end of each chapter there is a brain-training exercise. I found these exercises so helpful as I’ve been trying to take control of my own brain-training in other areas of life (gratitude, rejoicing, contentment). When I saw this tool built into the book after each chapter, I was thrilled that Annabelle would get to learn how to apply these truths in real life situations. One example of a brain-training exercise for the fear of loneliness. Annabelle drew a picture of a place where she felt alone (she drew a picture of her bedroom). Then she filled up all the space with words about where God is (she wrote “God is here” over and over with an arrow under her bed, behind the door, in the cupboard, in all the spaces). I loved the visual reminder that God is everywhere, so we are never alone.
Challenges
One of the hard things about the book was reflecting on scary stuff. Annabelle said, “I found it hard to think about my scary stuff. It made me think of them again. It wasn’t a nice feeling.” One of the purposes of the book is to teach kids not to avoid their fears. This was a good teaching moment for Annabelle to learn that fears will pop up like a beach ball whether we like it or not, so we may as well bring it into the light and address it with truth about God. We had lots of moments of tears and discomfort, but it was really worthwhile. Annabelle said, “I’m glad I did it because now my fears have shrunk.”
Audience
The book is aimed at 8–12-year-olds. Annabelle is 8, so she’s at the bottom end of the age range. She did struggle to think of examples at times. However, I would still encourage you to read this book with your 8-year-old if you think they will benefit from the training. The Bible studies are excellent, even if your child struggles with some of the questions. Everything is worked through together with a ‘coach’, which was me, the parent. It was easy to make suggestions or slow down if we needed to. I’m sure I learnt as much as Annabelle from the material.
I am so grateful to God and to Sarah for this wonderful book. I would highly recommend you pick it up for children in your life. I’m looking forward to reading it with my now 6-year-old in a couple of years.
